Exactly one year ago today (5/29), these were the words I wrote in my journal:
"One of the things I set before me at the beginning of this year was to see God invade my faith walk through the journey of having a baby. I should be careful what I pray for! For more than a year, having a baby consumed me. Now I've seemed to move on to adopting. I can't wait to get started. But I sense God telling me to wait. I feel a deeper longing and that is for His peace. I have believed the desire of my heart was to become a mother but now I realize it's something more - it is to know my God, to have His peace in my life and to serve Him with all that I am. I'm laying it all down, Lord. I surrender. I give up the fight. I only want you. Help my longings to be filled with only you. Oh God, my heart cries out for YOU. May you satisfy me to the point of overflowing. May this journey - wherever it leads - take me to You."
In just two days, we will meet our son. Our "Gotcha' Day" will be May 31, 2008, just three weeks after he was born. We will travel to Ohio on Friday and the birthmother will place him in our arms just after noon on Saturday. These are truly prayers directly answered by our Sovereign and Faithful God.
I can honestly tell you this has been a journey of faith. By the grace of God, I have never asked "why"...I have always known this is what God has planned. I haven't always understood, and it certainly hasn't all been easy, but His providential plan is now unfolding.
Everyone kept saying, "When you look back, you'll see how God worked it all out." Can I just tell you that being in the middle of the center of God's will PRESENTLY HAPPENING in our lives is UNBELIEVABLE!!!
If I have asked why it has been to wonder why He's been so good to us, why He's blessed us beyond what we deserve. All I know to tell you is when I prayed for a baby - MY BABY - He did not say "no"...He answered with a GREATER YES. No, it was not my plan. No, it was not what I would have chosen. But praise God, His greater yes was so much more than I could have ever asked for!
Pray with us. We will remain in Ohio for 7-10 days while we wait for the court to terminate birthfather rights and give us permanent and unrevokable custody (hmm, isn't that like God's adoption of us as His chosen sons and daughters?!).
We cannot wait for you to meet our son!
5 comments:
Carrie I am so excited for you and can't wait to meet him either! We love you!
Carrie, I have happy tears in my eyes! I can't tell you how happy I am for you and Ed and what a blessing it is to see the Lord give you the desires of your heart!!! Saturday @ noon we'll be celebrating...and we'll continue to pray!
Carrie ~ I know you and Ed are anxious and excited all at the same time. Know that we are praying for all three of you and are celebrating God's blessings on your family. Please let us know if there’s anything you guys need.
So very excited for you and Ed!!
You have articulated so well!! I may, at some point, need to borrow some of your wording! ;)
Carrie and Ed,
Our God is so Wonderful! There is nothing too hard for Him. To reflect back on this incredible journey which is about to end and see how He has provided and taken care of you is so exciting. I would love to be there to see you when the baby is placed in your arms on Saturday. The miracle will have taken place.
God Bless,
Sharon Hartless
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